If it’s possible to forgive fictitious characters, then I forgive all three. However, I would like to point out that I think the reason so many people feel badly for Snape over James is because it wasn’t just arrogance James was exhibiting. James bullied Snape. When you’re bullied, it can changes…
People are willing to forgive Snape because they cant/dont identify with James. Few of use who have read Harry Potter were anything close to the Cool Kids Who Rule The School. Star Athletes in our Field. Everyone Wants To Be Our Friend. Thats the world of James Potter. Not the world of the majority of HP readers. They live in Snape’s world. At least I know I did, and Im betting Im not the only one. Isolated. Underappreciated. Teased. Laughed at. Singled out and made to feel different. Holding onto a crush/love/obsession that was probably one way from day one.
We forgive Snape because we want others to forgive us. We want some validation in what we feel and get that by saying how “In the end it all works out.” Snape was the hero. WE were the hero in our own story that nobody knows. We cant forgive James because he hits too close to home, symbolizes everything we hated/wanted to be/were rejected by.
Forgiving James is the right thing to do. But it is also the much harder thing to do.